Kyle: You know what happens at UVA if I get to my dorm past midnight?
Kyle: Nothing, you know what happens when Liberty students get in their doom past midnight?
Me: They get their ticket to heaven taken away
My dentist once told me that letting go is like...
30secondstonarnia: #that’s a fucking deep dentist visit
Batman: Hey I'm going to disappear for 8 years.
Bruce Wayne: Hey I'm going to disappear for 8 years.
People of Gotham: Shut up Bruce, we're trying to figure out who Batman is.
Batman: I'M BACK!
Bruce Wayne: ME TOO.
People of Gotham: NO ONE CARES BRUCE. WHO THE FUCK IS BATMAN?
Me half the time: I just want to cuddle up with you and watch cute movies and look into your eyes and tell you I love you and kiss you lots and then fall asleep in your arms.
Me half of the time: I just want to rip off your clothes and get pushed against the wall with my arms pinned up and make out and push you onto your bed and we can fuck the shit out of each other, ok.
me on 2009: I must like every single page on facebook
me on 2012: I must unlike every single page on facebook
The feeling you get when you were actually the...
sodamnrelatable: DIE BITCH. Laugh, Scroll, Repeat.